Recalculating
Acts 9:1-6, (7-20)
Paul's conversion, baptism, and preaching
9:1 Meanwhile Saul, still breathing threats and murder against the disciples of the Lord, went to the high priest
9:2 and asked him for letters to the synagogues at Damascus, so that if he found any who belonged to the Way, men or women, he might bring them bound to Jerusalem.
9:3 Now as he was going along and approaching Damascus, suddenly a light from heaven flashed around him.
9:4 He fell to the ground and heard a voice saying to him, "Saul, Saul, why do you persecute me?"
9:5 He asked, "Who are you, Lord?" The reply came, "I am Jesus, whom you are persecuting.
9:6 But get up and enter the city, and you will be told what you are to do."
9:7 The men who were traveling with him stood speechless because they heard the voice but saw no one.
9:8 Saul got up from the ground, and though his eyes were open, he could see nothing; so they led him by the hand and brought him into Damascus.
9:9 For three days he was without sight and neither ate nor drank.
9:10 Now there was a disciple in Damascus named Ananias. The Lord said to him in a vision, "Ananias." He answered, "Here I am, Lord."
9:11 The Lord said to him, "Get up and go to the street called Straight, and at the house of Judas look for a man of Tarsus named Saul. At this moment he is praying,
9:12 and he has seen in a vision a man named Ananias come in and lay his hands on him so that he might regain his sight."
9:13 But Ananias answered, "Lord, I have heard from many about this man, how much evil he has done to your saints in Jerusalem,
9:14and here he has authority from the chief priests to bind all who invoke your name."
9:15 But the Lord said to him, "Go, for he is an instrument whom I have chosen to bring my name before gentiles and kings and before the people of Israel;
9:16 I myself will show him how much he must suffer for the sake of my name."
9:17 So Ananias went and entered the house. He laid his hands on Saul and said, "Brother Saul, the Lord Jesus, who appeared to you on your way here, has sent me so that you may regain your sight and be filled with the Holy Spirit."
9:18 And immediately something like scales fell from his eyes, and his sight was restored. Then he got up and was baptized,
9:19 and after taking some food, he regained his strength. For several days he was with the disciples in Damascus,
9:20 and immediately he began to proclaim Jesus in the synagogues, saying, "He is the Son of God."
I find it amazing the trouble some people will go to, to NEVER admit they were wrong. The mental, verbal, and occasionally even written gymnastics one must demonstrate to weasel out of an absolute mistake can be stupifying. However, when the faux pas is a bad or wrong choice performed intentionally, and even with gusto or passion, some folk will go to the mat time and time again to “prove” that their chosen move was correct, and the rest of the world was wrong. Psychology tells us that the more a person is skewed toward the “narcissistic” end of the continuum, the harder they will fight to show they weren’t wrong, and they often accuse others of the error. One of the funniest moments in the bizarre TV comedy “The Office” occurred when “Michael,” the office know-it-all manager, drove his car into a lake because he absolutely KNEW that his car’s GPS navigation system was always right, and should not be questioned. He and “Dwight” take an unexpected swim. Michael is an example of a benevolent narcissist, whose exploits make for good comedy, even he hurts people with his insistence on “being right” most of the time. We all know others in the world whose narcissistic tendencies are far more dangerous, don’t we?
I don’t think I’m a narcissist, at least I’ve never been diagnosed as one, and I HAVE done some therapy in my life, but I confess that this act of denying that I could be wrong has infected me more than I would like to admit. It usually happens when I have read something, or have one of those “mis-remembered” memories about something I experienced, and as I bring up the “fact” in conversation with friends, family, or parishioners, someone suggests I am wrong about it. In the case of the “mis-remembered” moments, it is usually my wife, who has a pretty darn-good memory. Her personality type (or Enneagram, if you know about those) is one that focuses on details and exactitude, while mine is that of a “storyteller,” for whom facts are a bit more fluid, when it benefits the story. Hence, when she “corrects” my facts, she is most often right, but frankly, the correction can ruin a perfectly good story. On the other hand, I find that my own powers of recall regarding something I have read is not always as foolproof as I think it is. I can’t tell you how many times I “Google” something I “recall” that I want to include in a sermon, only to find that my mind has warped some part of the account, and that my bit of research necessitates removing the element from consideration. The story I used in the first paragraph about “Michael” in “The Office” is a good example. In MY recollection of this story, it was “Dwight” who drove his car into the lake, but when I “Googled” it to check my facts, I had to stand corrected. Herein lies a difference: unlike a narcissist, I am more amenable to being corrected, and have developed my fact-checking skills to avoid reporting inaccurate stuff, even in a sermon, which by nature may include much speculation, and more than a little creativity.
It also seems that the smarter we are—or assert we are—the easier it is to fall prey to this “being right” syndrome. I’m guessing the world would be a much more peaceful place if a plurality of us would abandon this notion and be willing to “stand corrected,” rather than boasting, “Here I stand” so quickly. Modern politics has really schooled us in the folly of believing “our side” is so much more “right” than the other side, as it has become clear that the “sides” have switched back and forth as to which one is more “right” over the decades—at least as far positive outcomes have shown—and each “side” has had its share of error, from which we all suffered. As Christ-followers, perhaps this acquiescing to truth and humility could plant seeds of a better society. Someone has to listen to their “better angels” if we are to keep from killing each other, so why shouldn’t it be we people of faith? So, where am I going with this?
Today’s text is the story of the conversion of “Saul,” a Jewish religious leader who made it his “thing” to ferret out and destroy (often literally) followers of Jesus Christ, whom he saw as heretics to his faith. Paul envisioned his mission as being “so right” that he was willing to kill to further it. Just before this text, we read in the Book of Acts about Saul standing by and holding Stephen’s cloak as the man is stoned to death for his “blasphemy.” How anyone can feel they are so “right” that they feel vindicated by putting the other to death, I just don’t get? Especially in matters of religion? I suppose this could make me a pacifist, but I do understand people taking up arms to protect freedoms, gain justice, or to preserve the peace against fascistic or authoritarian foes, so maybe not. America was, after all, a nation born out of a revolutionary war, so if I am willing to remain a citizen, I must embrace this part of our national “DNA.” But Saul’s story was different. His objection to the budding “Christian” faith was that it diverged from his own belief, a “sin” punishable by death, in his mind. He watched Stephen being murdered. Some have suggested this gruesome scene may have “softened” Saul, preparing him for what would occur on the Damascus Road. Maybe, but as we have unfortunately seen in our own time and in the USA, ideological hatred of any kind can turn deadly very fast. Paul was on his way to “prosecute” more Christ-followers, and we have no evidence that his ire against them wouldn’t have escalated to encourage more “stonings.” In this case, though, God intervened.
Several times in his various epistles, Saul—who takes the name of “Paul,” sometime after his dramatic conversion—defends himself by citing his academic and religious pedigree, as well as his personal history. However, these are not used in an attempt to prove that he was “right,” as much as to dramatically set off his encounter with Jesus on the Damascus Road. The Saul that was on his way to further persecute the church founded by Jesus and the Holy Spirit, is radically turned around by the “bright light” that emanated from the resurrected Christ and temporarily blinded the Pharisee. His whole life needed to be “recalculated.” His understanding of what Yahweh wanted of him was updated, and his mission in life vectored in a new direction. Sounds prodigious? It is, but how many of us can tell our own stories of this happening to us? Indeed, the word we translate “repent” is a Greek word literally meaning, “stop, turn around, and go in the opposite direction.” One preacher I heard years ago said it means “turning one’s life GODWARD.” Recalculating, indeed! My whole life, career, and marriage had to be “recalculated” when God called me into the ministry, and I’ll bet MANY of you hearing or reading this sermon can tell your own Christian “conversion” or “call story,” and how it changed everything!
Quite a number of my parishioners, down through the years, have lamented that they don’t have a “dramatic” conversion story like Paul. However, neither did John Wesley, the “father” of Methodism. He was raised in a good Christian home, taught the faith “religiously” by his mother, Susanna, and educated and ordained into the Anglican Church as a priest. It was years later, though, that while attending a Christian meeting at a private home on Aldersgate Street in London (after church one Sunday night), he “felt his heart strangely warmed,” and his ministry took on a radically new direction. He was already a committed Christian, but this experience was like a “light going on” for him, and his entire life started to “recalculate.” It was this “enlightenment” that led to what the world came to know as the Methodist movement in 18th Century England. It transformed religious life in London and spread across the globe. I had a similar experience, in that I was also raised by godly parents, was active in my home church, and made many youthful commitments to faith in Christ. However, during a private “encounter” with God in my dorm room during my first year at college, I experienced the “light going on,” and my own journey toward what eventually became a call to ministry began. Likewise, I found this experience required “recalculating” my direction in life. Not everybody has an “Aldersgate” experience, either, nor a dramatic “conversion” like Paul. It doesn’t mean that God isn’t giving you direction, and certainly doesn’t mean that God won’t use your gifts! As another preacher once told me, God desires your AVAILABILITY even more than your ABILITY!
Speaking of recalculating, Dara and I recently attended a seminar co-sponsored by Pittsburgh Theological Seminary and the United Methodist Foundation on “Fishing Differently. The gist of the seminar was that, if the church is to reach a modern constituency and find a way to fund its ministry, it has to “recalculate” its mission. While evangelism and “offering them Christ” will always be part of what we do, the presenter, Dr. Sidney Williams, said his church has built a vital ministry by forming a separate non-profit organization to meet physical and emotional needs in its community. They offer free community meals, help meet housing and employment needs, offer support groups for those ill from addictions, and provide counseling services, among others. He described these ministries as focusing on Jesus’ humanity, while the “identity” ministries the church usually centers on are more about Jesus’ divinity. Dr. Williams called these human need ministries impact ministries, and said that there are a variety of funding sources and “investors” who will fund impact ministries. And it is these impact ministries that eventually open the door to our traditional ministries like evangelism, worship, and education. In the case of his AME church, the congregation raises enough dollars to fund its “traditional” ministries, while the impact ministries are funded at a $2.6 million dollar level by other foundations and community-based sources. Both “pots” provide funding to maintenance church buildings and properties. “Recalculating” in today’s church may be an even bigger deal than Paul’s dramatic Damascus Road conversion, at least if the church is to move forward.
The GPS/navigation system in one of our cars would say, “Recalculating,” every time we either ignored its suggested direction or made a “wrong” turn. Rather than get mad and just quit giving direction, it would “recalculate” and provide updated directions. God is like that, too! Don’t ever fear “missing” what God wants of your life. Yes, the Holy Spirit may call on YOU to do some “recalculating,” just like Saul/Paul, but God ALSO is willing to recalculate when we either change direction on our own, or are a little foggy in hearing God’s direction for our lives. Remember, God LOVES you. Love means never having say “I won’t recalculate!” And talk about recalculating, don’t you love the acquiescence demonstrated by good ol’ Ananias here? He was this Christ-follower, just minding his own business following Jesus, when God rocks his world by telling him to go find Saul to pray that his sight be restored. Ananias knows full-well who SAUL is, and what he’s been up to, so he initially registers a little protest to the Almighty, but God assures him that it is important that he do this. Ananias REALLY has to “recalculate” his thinking, put on his “courageous cap,” and boldly go right into the belly of the beast, as they say. I love how he starts his introduction to the world-class persecutor of Christians with “Brother Saul…” Brilliant! And while the text doesn’t specifically say, I believe it was Ananias who gets to BAPTIZE Paul into his “recalculated” faith. How cool is that? For all of us Gentile Christians, we should have a statue of Ananias around somewhere, as without his willingness to minister to Saul/Paul, we might still be lost in the weeds, apart from God, for Paul becomes the “Apostle to the Gentiles.” Reminds me of a story I read years ago in a “Guideposts” devotional about a middle-aged shoe store salesman who gets convicted of his nominal Christianity during a church revival meeting and in his “recalculation,” promises God he will witness to the first person coming into his store on Monday. That first person was a tall, athletic teenage boy looking for new sneakers, and witnessing to the young man was WAY out of the salesman’s comfort zone, but he sticks with his commitment, shares his faith witness, and invites the young man to church. That young man was Billy Graham. Most of us probably have at least one family member or friend whose faith was touched by Rev. Graham.
The moral of this sermon is: never be afraid to admit your faults (sins?) and “recalculate” your life, as the Good Lord leads. We never know how wonderful the outcome may be for us, if not for others, as well. Persons who resist capitulating to their “better angels” or who refuse to “recalculate” may, as the old expression says, “win the battle but lose the war.” Each of us is called to “go on to perfection,” in the words of Mr. Wesley, and the only way to do so is to keep asking God for fresh direction and “recalculate” when necessary! And from our “lesson” with Dr. Sidney Williams, maybe the modern church has its own “recalculation” in order? Now, let’s get to it! Amen.